Resonant? Maybe

This week's blog post is an excercise taken from McKee et al's Becoming a Resonant Leader (McKee, Boyatzis, & Johnston, 2008). The idea of resonant leadership seems to be the next step after acquiring a mastery of emotional intelligence. After all, how can one hope to inspire others and create a positive tone for others if one does not know themselves? Additionally, a given leader must understand how they are reacting to stress and take steps to renew themselves so that positive environments can be maintained.

Thus far, in my readings into resonant leadership haven't reached a firm conclusion on the following but it seems that resonant leadership places the onus of creating a positive environment on the leader and less on the follower. However, these relationships are symbiotic and often draw from each other so it is important that a leader understand that followers will also need the same steps for self-renewal as well as possible sharing leadership roles. There is a danger in a leader thinking of themselves as some sort of guru and becoming unaware of how resonance means that all parts work together.

Below are the questions asked of me in the excercise along with my insights.

1. Am I inspirational? Do I inspire people?

I don't know that I am or am not inspirational. I don't exactly pass out surveys and most people in my life are unaware of the struggles I've overcome to get to where I am. Nor do I feel inclined to share the more distasteful episodes of my past and while there is nothing overtly scandalous in my past it is mine and I don't enjoy being vulnerable. Additionally, I move far too often for deep relationships to form. Perhaps one can be inspirational without sharing a great deal of themselves but if so I am not seeing the path.

All of that being said, I do try to lead by example. I've never asked someone I've supervised to do something that I was unwilling to do. In my current work-group I make myself available for roles that others might not want simply because it's good practice and the patients need the help. Others may draw inspiration from seeing someone going about their job with ethics, standards, and an eye for providing the best service to patients that is possible. They did nominate me for a small award for such. So perhaps it is a form of inspiration.

However, I don't draw inspiration from flowery speeches and I don't expect anyone to draw inspiration from anything I say. I am much more impressed by action and so I try to lead by example. That isn't to say motivational speaking isn't a great tool and I do use motivational interviewing and positive encouragement in my line of work. So in essence, for me I try to inspire but what inspires me and that is more doing and less talking when working with peers and switch to different type of motivation when working with patients. Part of that may very well be that behavioral health specialists have seen and heard so many horror stories and so many excuses that words are often not enough.

2. Do I create an overall positive emotional tone that is characterized by hope? How?

Seeing as how this my job I certainly hope so! Many of the patients with which my office works are struggling in more than one area of their lives. Some of them are happy that way. While others are wanting to work on improving themselves but they've been so beat down by life and poor choices that they can't see the light at the end of tunnel. It's our job to provide that light and the route to take to get there. That can't be done without hope and a positive tone. Also, this type of work is emotionally draining and so we often maintain positive tones among ourselves and provide mutual support.

3. Am I in touch with others? Do I really know what is in others' hearts and on their minds? How do I show this?

I try to be. One can never really know what goes on in the hearts of others but we can evaluate their actions. This is an extension of my approach to inspiration in that I am much more impressed by seeing actions rather than hearing words and I live my life this way. I have never been one to use ten words when five will do. But I will seek to understand others and to demonstrate that I will work as hard towards their goals as they are if not more so if they are in place where they need the support. I ask questions, I actively listen, and I try very, very hard to remain non-judgmental. Understanding that we don't always know the struggles of others, we don't know their pasts, we don't know their barriers, their health, their multitude of stories that make up a life means that we meet others with open minds. I believe that by meeting people on the level that feel comfortable helps place them at ease and begins to lay the foundation for healthy relationship.

4. Do I regularly experience and demonstrate compassion? How?

Working with people who have addictions, mental health disorders, and usually physical health impairments means that the term compassion fatigue applies to myself and most of my co-workers. Treating compassion fatigue requires mindfulness and some sort of self-renewal process; much as with resonant leadership. If I am honest I am sometimes faking compassion until I can find a way to feel it. Opening one's self to an endless litany of horror stories drains the compassion from a person. I'd like to have a better answer for this question but the truth is that while I am compassionate if I don 't take time for myself whatever compassion I have will ebb away. Resonant leadership stresses self-renewal and speaking from personal experience, self renewal is vital.

5. Am I authentic and in tune with myself, others, and the environment? How can people see this in me? 

If I am not authentic with myself how can I be authentic with anyone or anything? I try to not allow the darker parts of my psyche (which we all have) go unaddressed. We all suffer from our pasts and we all have learned and grown from our pasts in some way or another. Being authentic isn't just about being honest with one's self but it is taking the step to accepting one's self and using the whole of you to reach the whole of others. I endeavor to be as authentic as I am able in my dealings with others. My co-workers and I are very authentic with each other and that is probably why our team works as well as it does. It's refreshing to know that others see you for who you are and accept you and I give the same in return.


McKee, A., Boyatzis, R. E., & Johnston, F. (2008). Becoming a resonant leader: develop your emotional intelligence, renew your relationships, sustain your effectiveness. Boston, MA: Harvard Business School Pub.